Thursday, August 12, 2010
well its really confuse for. ytd i saw the conversation between dar and her agian. really dnno why should him text him after so long? he say she is blah blah then wad for? trying to get something out from there again. It doesnt seems nice but he doesnt seems to understand. well at least he admit. and say he have noone to speak to so think of her then msg her. told him i dont like he say will stop doing it but how true? I don't know. somehow i feel like really travelling to overseas so I don't need to continue this rs anymore. because is really tiring guessing and worrying. what for? is that true love? Neh... and will never be... love is trust but somehow I can no longer do so. There are so many things out in this world I wanna do wanna try but because of family because of him I can't.I begain to wonder. What do I live for? For others or for me? I really don't know. Can anyone tell me?
I felt miserable living. I cant seems to see my goal. my aim. my deam. I am one that have tons of dreams inside. Tons of things that from young I have told myself I will do. But I can't.
God or anyone can someone tell me. What the reason I am being born to this world? I am not stupid. I dare to say I am smart but lazy. But. with my smartness but restriction what can I do?
all along. since young. till now. I only want to live a simple carefree life. But it seems more and more difficult. things come and I can't avoid. No one can really know how I really felt all along. I laugh, I smile not because I am happy. But is because I don't want people around me to be unhappy thats all. but how many actually really sit down and care what I felt?
I felt tired. Really tired. Love. may I know what is it? When I thought I could trust again. TIMES AND TIMES AGAIN THINGS APPEAR AND MAKE ME CAN'T! I am very fragile you know????!!! I appear to be strong to be fierce to protect myself because I have no choice! I am born in a family that is very complicated. And times am always left alone. Because of my size. since young people always bully me. that why my wall was built up. You break it. ensure me that y ou will protect me from fear and tear. But you didn't. You just give me more than what I have.
You know I am so fucking stress???? Does anyone know?Fucking why why and why. why should i have all these crap? and I a very very bad girl in the past so this life I am born to suffer? If one day I really went insane. I am going to let go everything I have and be a volunteer go around the world to help people. Don't need care and listen nonsense ever again.
I miss your beautiful smile ... 1:48 AM
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
I felt so miserable... So wrong... Once bitten twice shy... I didn't learn it... I am sorry... So sorry... Feeling damm sick... I wanna fly far far away... far far away and rest... I wanna fly far far far away dont want stay in this damm fucking place anymore... :(
I miss your beautiful smile ... 8:18 AM
Disclaimers ♥
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Miserable ♥
I am a simple minded gal yet stubborn at times. faithful towards love and aiming for perfection.<3
Fierce at sometimes & blur at all times <3
Kiddy and cute is my symbol<3
fat & chubby is what I am <3
Happily attached with Lim Ma Don <3
Craves,Loves,Hates ♥
craves : Soft toys
Pooh Bear
Nice hair style
Care from my Deardear
Nice clothings
Cute bags
Love Manga
Going MALDIVES Loves :
Puppies
Stars
taking pictures
travelling to different countries with dear
all chats are allowed here , Grandmother stories , Flirting , whatever !
Runaway-s ♥
Avelyn ♥
Candy ♥
Credits ♥
Designer: Audiee-kewgirl♥Bascodes : kathleen
image : enakei,photobucket
Brushes : Deviantart
Why did you leave me ?
I keep asking myself why .
But i just can't seems to get an answer . Different answers keep floating across my mind.
It's making me very sick.
I really miss you ...
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