Wednesday, July 22, 2009
Haiz... dunno why maybe i over sensitive but the feeling of inferior that has been gone for long or hidden has came back.. I dunno what to do... because of a msg i become so intense... and thoughts start to wonder....ytd.. someone msg my dear... was a friendly chat asking whether is my dear continuing his job... well this gal name is ERH XIN MEI... they exchange hp no as they need to contact on the first day. She was the one who first day bring my dear to the place to work as instruction given by the boss becox my dear was a new staff... apparently i dunno who on earth the one who msg my dear is as no name is being save... so i thought maybe some guy his collegue? so i called... then a gal pick up.. apparently i supposed she heard my voice rather than my bf voice so she pretend to keep hello~~~ den when i raise my voice she pretend that she heard... i ask her who is she... she said " i am his friend"...
Upon hearing this word friend my temper hit limit .... who on the earth is she to make friend with my boi? i mean i ask my boi.. he dun even regard her as a friend.. :@!!!!
ok so.. i ask friend? got name wad... wad ur name la... den she erm erm erm then finally she say her name xin mei!!!! then i was fucking pissed cox.. this bloody gal no. i have deleted from my bf hp.... so i wonder she msg my boi for? well nvm i was still calm... i thought maybe my boi ask her to take the form and etc... so i asked... why did u msg him? she say juz ask him whether is he continue working.. so i ask oh hhhh ok.. he ask u to take form for him is it? she say NO... this is where my volcano erupted!!!!! (I WAS THINKING NO DEN U MSG HIM FOR FUCK?) den i asked... so did he msg you? ( i thought maybe my boi msg her mah so she msg back nothing wrong) then she replied!!!! erm no... den I hit limit liao.. I say nvm... ok then bb...
so i confronted my bf.. went to check his list of msging pple.. then found tt bitch number.. which is number after his dad.. so which is a few days back.. so i ask my boi.. why u say nv msg her... den got her contact in ur msging list? den he said juz msg er to ask her help him get the form... so i say den why she say nv... den he say how i knw... well i have fucking no evidence.. so i cant do anythng... he delete his sent items... den i went on... how u gt her number since i deleted? he say get from others.. but wad make me pissed is... WHY NEED HER TO HELP HIM TAKE FORM?? CANNOT ASK OTHERS MEH? WHO THE FUCK IS SHE?
ok then he diam diam... follow by he did nasty thign to me... though he apologise and etc.. bt i was damm hurt... nearly really end this relationship.. I meant it real... not childish act..
after that ask him to msg tt gal not to call him or msg him again he die oso dun wan.. make me damm pissed!! well i do understand lyk v. wad bt i seriously dun lyk tt gal ok!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
den i msg... in a v. nice way... in the end the gal never reply....
i dunno why.... bt i felt inferior... and the gal msg him during his army time? cox tue dear suppose to be in amry but he with me... cox mc.... count herself suay...
but well.. dunno why i feel lyk letting go this rs. ya i have no confidence and trust regardless of myself or my bf... i dunno wad going on between them maybe nothing.... just that i over sensitive or maybe.. tt is really something.... another reason for me being so sensitive is also because my dear lyk to delete other pple msg... so how would i know??
i dunno.... bt if sat..i going see things... and if my boi lie that she is damm fuckign fat when i see that she is not... maybe i will end this rs... i v.v.v. tired... i know my boi love me alot... but i dunno... really dunno... other than me... is he seeing anybody else? fond of any1 else? or lyk or wadeva shit... or even friends...
i became over sensitive and possesive.... this bitch make wad i try to hide and forget appear again... she make me doubt on my rs again.......... i dun deny tt the factor of trust in our rs is weak..
dunno why went to yahoo and search for her name and etc.... found out that... she is from anderson JC... should be JC1 if I am not wrong.... full name ERH XIN MEI... well she better dun contact my bf anymore... if i find that again..... I cfm make it v. ugly in her work place... and my dear... u can prepare for a breakup...
suddenly.. dunno why i thnk off those number without names keep appear on my dear phone... who on earth are they? dear keep say army personnel....
i going to check this time round... every single one......... if one more time................ i call and is a gal who answer............ my next post will be on breaking up........
rem... if i result to breakup i will never turn back.. i cant stand betray... not even once... never.... even it is just friend... i gave u chance but if u lied so dun blame me for that.............
I miss your beautiful smile ... 10:11 AM
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Miserable ♥
I am a simple minded gal yet stubborn at times. faithful towards love and aiming for perfection.<3
Fierce at sometimes & blur at all times <3
Kiddy and cute is my symbol<3
fat & chubby is what I am <3
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Why did you leave me ?
I keep asking myself why .
But i just can't seems to get an answer . Different answers keep floating across my mind.
It's making me very sick.
I really miss you ...
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